what did you do today?

In the fall of 1976, I was a sophomore in college. My roommate Susan and I would spend many hours just sitting on our dorm beds talking about nothing in particular. Occasionally, we would play “what is your mother doing today?” Based on their 1970s stay-at-home mom routines, we both knew exactly what our mothers were doing on any given day. “It’s Thursday, my mom is doing laundry,” Susan would say. I’d follow with, “My mom is going to the bank to cash a check and then to the grocery store to buy groceries.” We laughed at their predictability…however, we never questioned their value.

In 2014, “What did you do today?” seems like a loaded question. When asked, it can sound more to me like, “Did you do anything of value?” On days I’ve been busy, I’m proud to share in detail all that I’ve done, making me feel important and good about myself.  If I really didn’t do much of anything, I feel defensive in my response, embarrassed at my lack of activity and questioning my value to the greater good.

So, here’s what I’m wondering…how do I really bring value to a day? Is it based on how important I am or how busy I am?

I think there are four things I can learn from our 70’s moms that speak to how I can bring value to what I do every day whether or not I’m “busy” or “important.”

1. Be dependable. Thinking back…it didn’t really matter to Susan and I what our moms did each day. We knew we could depend on them, and that’s all we really cared about.
2. Be responsible. Our moms didn’t have the most glamorous jobs.  They cooked, cleaned, and cared for their families. But they did it responsibly and with excellence.
3. Be a good listener. When we were school-aged kids, our moms were there to debrief our days; and when we were college students, they were there to receive our once-a-week phone calls.  Listening was possibly the most important “activity” they did for us.
4. Be helpful. Our moms were always thinking of ways to help us—without being asked and without fanfare.  Just small kindnesses that said, “I love you.”

At the end of a day, I like the feeling of having done something important.  But, I’m just thinking, I’m really okay with being boring and predictable if I’ve done something of value.

 

Featured photos:  UGA, 1975-79.  My mom and dad (left); with friends Patsy and Susan (top right); Susan’s mom and dad (middle right); Susan in the dorm (bottom right).